Should older siblings take care of younger ones?

Having siblings is a wonderful thing and can be very positive for children, because with them they can learn and share many things, as well as help keep negative feelings away. And of course, the treatment that parents give will influence the relationship that siblings will have.

When a younger brother is born, the older one tends to grow suddenly, and after a few years, in some families - unconsciously or deliberately - he acquires certain responsibilities related to his younger brother. But, Should older siblings take care of younger ones?

Every family is different.

Of course, with such a topic we cannot simply generalize and now, there are many factors that we must consider before answering this question. Each family is different and therefore your needs or your way of functioning and organizing will be different from the others.

For example, if both parents work outside the home and the siblings take each other a sufficient number of years to notice the difference, a certain age has arrived. it is possible that the older brother will take care of some things if they are left at home after school To return to his office.

In other families, perhaps, because of the small age difference between each sibling, whether one of them is responsible or helps take care of the other, It simply is not an option and is not even something to consider.

The 'pressure' of being the older brother

As I mentioned at the beginning of this article, when a baby is born, the older brother seems much bigger than he is, because Now that there is another smaller child at home, you start to see the difference between one another, looking like a very small one and another older than it really is.

Now that the smallest of the house also requires care and attention of the parents, it is possible that the treatment towards the older brother may change, since now the minor needs them for many things that the older one already knows how to do. Somehow, this causes parents to believe certain expectations of the older brother, which did not exist before the arrival of a new baby home.

In my experience as an older sister, I don't remember that my parents have ever told me the famous "you must set the example", but I do remember feeling that they expected a lot or more from me. Somehow I had the impression that I should do things better or that with me they were more demanding than with my younger sister.

Of course, this is my perception, but speaking with other people who are also older brothers, I found that we had similar feelings. Some time ago we shared an article that talked about how the order of birth of children influences their personality, and there it was commented that the elderly tend to be more perfectionist, responsible and orderly, because we do not want to disappoint.

Involve the elderly in the care of minors, yes, but with measure

Returning to the question titled in this article, I believe that no, older brothers should not take care of small ones, at least not as if it were your responsibility. A brother is not a father, and it is only the parents who are solely responsible for the care of the children, whether young or old.

The older brothers of course they can participate and support in some care of their younger siblings, perhaps like observing that they are not in danger or accompanying him and perhaps teaching him some things, but at the end of the day, care is the work of the parents.

We must foster a good relationship between brothers, and not make them feel that any of their siblings is their responsibility, or worse, that they feel they are a burden. We can involve the major in the care of a new baby, so that he feels participant in the arrival of the new member and who teams up with his parents. But it is more important that you feel at ease.

When we prepare the children for the arrival of a little brother, it is normal for them to like to participate and alone they have the initiative to help take care of it. But what we should not allow or make older children feel, is that their younger brother is their responsibility or demand them too much just because they are bigger.

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In Babies and more | Involve the older brother in caring for the baby, The older brother is usually responsible, but must also be flexible